Thursday, December 11, 2008

Dealing with Rudeness (Etiquette, p. 35-37)

Five kinds of Rudeness:

1. Aggressive Rudeness - designed to punish you for something you've done. Tailgating if a driver feels you've cut them off.

2. Casual Rudeness - Yakking loudly on a cell phone, blocking the sidewalk to chat.

3. Rudeness in Disguise - "Love that new haircut. You look so much better than before!"

4. Unwitting Rudeness - Poor table manners, talking loudly because of hearing loss.

5. Bottom-of-the-Barrel Behavior - obscenities in public, blowing your nose in anything but tissue or hankie, spitting on the sidewalk.

Art of Responding:

1. Don't take it personally. Offender may have had a bad day. Give the benefit of the doubt.

2. Size up your annoyances. Let things go.

3. Take responsibilities for your own actions. Did I do something to provoke the treatment.

4. Mentally count to ten. "Is it really worth blowing my stack over it?"

5. Use Humor. When someone says, "You look terrible." You could respond, "How kind of you to say so!"

If you must respond, try to use a nice tone. Instead of "Shut up" How about "Many of us are trying to read, would you mind lowering your voice? Thanks."

If you are rude whether inadvertently or on purpose, apologize and an explanation can soothe hurt feelings.

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